I've been gone a while again. But with the added benefit that I now understand a lot more about myself. Whenever I'm too stressed, I can't write. You can tell me I need to. I know I need to. But I can't. Stress weighs me down better than a rock in a cloth bag, sinking in the stream. I can only swim when the rock is removed, or at least shrunk a bit.
Some of my former readers may remember my aunt who moved in with my mom and I last summer. For the rest of you, my aunt is a mentally disturbed individual with a lot of problems in her past. We were letting her stay with us because she was virtually homeless and in a really bad position. We cleaned her up and let her rest with us for six whole months. And do you know what she did to repay us?
She married the guy who lived with his parents across the street from us, stole a truck and hunting gun from someone who lives in our town, and robbed a bank right down the road from our house. Then, she took the money, gun, truck, and then fiance back to her parent's house where she was then discovered and arrested. Her new husband was the one who actually walked in the bank with a bandanna over his face and the gun in his hand and robbed the bank of its money. He even shot the gun two times in the bank, over the heads of the patrons there!
I have never been so horrified in my life! How could she do this? How could HE do this? I mean, she's an absolute nutcase, we knew that, but what's his excuse? Oh, and they were caught with drugs (enough to get intent to sell instead of just possession) and drug paraphernalia. They have like four felonies, and two or three misdemeanors.
It's all so unbelievable. We're embarrassed and sad and angry and a whole host of other emotions that I don't want to even get into. But because of the stress from this whole mess, I haven't been able to write for weeks! I couldn't even think about it. My creative juices were at nil, and my desire to work was even lower.
Finally, though, I'm getting over it. But it made me think about my lulls in writing in the past. They only occur when there is a major upheaval in my life and the stress becomes overwhelming. My emotions control my writing ability so much, it's a little frightening.
How do other people do it? How do you get over the major stress and write anyway? Is it a matter of discipline? Do I not have enough? Or do I just have more stressful events (by the way people talk about my life, lots of people seem to think so)?
I mourn the stressful events of my life, and the loss of writing that I've accrued because of it. BUT, when I think about it, I also have to be a bit glad for what I've experienced. My exciting, terrifying, horrifying, sad life has given me a lot of inspiration for stories and a lot of insight into how my heroes and heroines might feel. I have no doubt it has made me a better writer.
What do you think? Do you stop writing when something major in your life happens? How many major things have occurred in your life, and do you think those things made you a better writer?
Thanks so much for reading, and I'm sorry I've been gone so long. It seems to be a constant trouble with me. But at least I come back with some exciting stories to tell! ;) Have a great day everyone, and happy writing!